!@Paradox of Progress - Outline

Paradox of progress (in meditation), and why do anything at all? Why strive for success when you could just be satisfied? How to strive further and being satisfied with what you have

Why strive if you suffer

These 3 might be the whole thing

!Diligently Attentive is what counts anyway

Why I have/had a strong resistance to progress (if not strictly meditation related)

Not sure if these should be here

What matters morally To be moral is to actualize your potential

Outline

The one thing I want someone to take away from this: You can and probably need to live each moment for itself in the context of greater progress.

  1. Why do we strive when it is exactly what makes us suffer?

    1. Look at the monks perfectly happy without striving

    2. We even strive after things that don't make us happy

      1. Most of the payoff is short-term and nothing long-term

    3. This suggests we can only be happy by being grateful for and accepting the present, but as humans we naturally want to improve and change things.

      1. Does progress always give us a mirage of future happiness or should we sometimes consciously strive to improve.

        1. Striving to improve is so human, but also clearly the source of so much pain

        2. When caught up in the suffering from striving, it's worth asking yourself if you'd really be happier with the new thing.

          1. or would you just hedonicly adapt
          2. clearly some things like building better relationships in your life could truly have a long-term positive impact

  2. So how do we reconcile being satisfied and grateful with what we have, while striving for better? Don't the two inherently contradict?

    1. living now

      1. accepting this moment fully

    2. higher progress

      1. while on a greater path

    3. But we can still be with each step of that journey. It's the difference between "fuck, I slipped" and "fuck -- oh wait, I was expecting to mess up anyway, and this is really also an opportunity to improve." Seeing challenges as opportunities.

      1. Basically, you can be grateful for each part of the process because each challenge truly is an opportunity to succeed.

    4. **The journey is made up of only single steps, but there does not need to be striving in each moment to reach towards higher goals. We should strive and hope when creating plans, but not when following them through. **

      1. This is what you do in yoga or meditation.

        1. Non-striving confused me a lot at the beginning, I'm trying to get better at these things

          1. But you're striving at different scales.
        2. In this moment, the best thing you can do is accept your body and mind exactly as they are, understanding that and working with that rather than wishing you were at a later stage of the practice. You are doing the important work of going through this challenging stage of this long journey

      2. But in everything we do, it does make sense to reach towards higher goals because we are biologically hardwired to do so, and this is especially useful when we are striving after things that we actually believe will improve our own or others long-term well-being.

        1. But even things we don't think will, bringing attention to each step of the journey in improving at them itself can make them meaningful and enjoyable.

          1. e.g. playing music.

writing attempt 2

Why strive when it is exactly what makes us suffer?

We strive after unobtainable, never-ending voids of desire. More money, fame, status, sex. Some people can balance the cycles of chasing and obtaining these things, but often wanting more is an itch that can't stay scratched. Dissatisfaction drives our efforts: We imagine that there's a certain promotion or achievement that will make us happier in the future, and it will—for a very short period of time until it you adapt to it as normal. Desire and dissatisfaction both come back.

By striving I don't mean working hard—hard work is necessary, important, and ultimately more satisfying than slacking off. By striving I mean wishing for things to do be different. Dissatisfaction is in that space between where you are and where you wish you were.

The next achievement, goal, or purchase feels like it will be life-changing, but if you've ever gotten any of these things you've chased after, why do you still feel like you haven't made it—like something is still lacking?

From an evolutionary perspective, overestimating how good future rewards will be, getting them, and then becoming dissatisfied and looking for more and better is the strategy that got us here.

So even if you believe as I do that we'd be happiest by learning to let what we already have be enough, we are biologically hard-wired to want more. Regardless, there are still good reasons to have future goals, and they don't have to breed dissatisfaction.

When progress is worth it

The first way striving for more is worth it is when you genuinely expect it to improve your own well-being. I don't actually think that achieving any level of career success or status will make me consistently happier, I'll just want more. But I do think my friends will greatly improve my life in the long run, and that it's worth putting in serious effort into those relationships.

It's a sort of mental minimalism—limiting your desires to the few that will actually help you or others.

When caught up in the worries and frustrations from striving, it's worth asking yourself if you'd really be happier with the thing that you're chasing. Would you be willing to bet that the version of you who got better grades, got the promotion, or is getting paid more, is more satisfied in their life a year later?

Aside from yourself, striving for the sake of others is also valuable. The success and happiness in my own life is almost completely in debt to the thousands of generations before me who luckily decided that they cared about the future. In my room I am surrounded by objects, clothes, and technology which could only be created due to centuries of past human cooperation. It would take me more than a lifetime to start from scratch and try to craft just socks that are as well-fitting, comfortable and precisely manufactured as mine. We are living in the most abundant and peaceful time in human history, but there is still so much suffering to end and heights of human flourishing that we could reach. We have the opportunity to continue this tradition of working for the betterment of people alive today and generations to come.

At first it seems that striving for others may be detrimental to your own well-being. I have rarely found this to be the case, and anecdotally see that those who are both happiest and find their lives most meaningful work to make others better off. One of the most selfish things you can do is act more selflessly.

It's worth the effort to genuinely improve your own and others' lives, but almost all other striving leads to endless cycles dissatisfaction. Improving your own well-being calls for non-striving on nearly all other fronts, but It's lucky that we find helping others so meaningful, and I think part of the reason for this is that it naturally makes us take on the following mindset.

Living each moment for itself in the context of greater progress

Although striving and satisfaction seem to be contradictory, you can live each moment entirely for itself while still choosing a series of actions that lead you towards achieving your goals.

Any journey towards a goal is made up of only tiny steps, but there does not need to be striving or dissatisfaction in each moment of execution to reach towards goals. We should strive and hope when creating plans, but not when following them through.

Yoga or meditation is a good analogy here. Someone who meditates or does yoga is trying to get better at it or make use of it outside of their practice. Across weeks and months they hope to improve, but in any single practice session they work with their mind or body exactly as it is. It's the difference between "damn it, I messed up" and "damn it -- oh wait, I was expecting to mess up anyway, and this is also a chance to improve." An aspect of the practice is fully accepting whatever point in your progress you happen to be at each day. You close the distance between where you are and where you wish you were, while still putting in your full effort.

This is not only a useful mindset emotionally, but also for progress. It's both more enjoyable and effective to accept where you are on your path towards your goals—understanding and working with where you are rather than wishing you were already at a later stage. Further, these achievements or skills would be worthless if you didn't have to work for them. There would be no satisfaction in learning a language if you could download it to your brain, or in running a marathon if it was as easy as driving one.

On a daily scale or shorter, you commit to your priorities and put in the work. There's no use in worrying about doing better than whatever your best is today. You can accept now as it is even while pursuing larger goals over longer time-scales.

Wishing for or trying to force yourself to be at any other stage will only delay your progress. You are doing the important work of going through this challenging stage of this long journey.

writing

Being poor is wanting more

- [[Striving is the source of both suffering and progress]]

Why strive at all?

I agree with the Buddha that the path to freedom from suffering is the lack of desire and striving for things to change. But I'm also doing many things to improve myself and my life. Is this contradictory?

Is the price for higher success ever worth it? (Watch Whiplash if you want to think about this for two hours)

- [[Being poor is not having too little, it is wanting more]]

We often strive after these sort of unobtainable things that are really never-ending voids of desire. More money, fame, status, sex. Although a few people can balance the cycles of striving and obtainment of these things well, more often wanting more is a desire that will stay unfulfilled regardless of how much you get. We imagine that there's a certain promotion or salary that will make us permanently happier in the future, and it will -- for a very short period of time until you adapt to that as your new normal. Then both the desire and dissatisfaction both come back.

If you've ever gotten any of these things you've chased after, why do you still feel you haven't made it, like something is still lacking?

Still each decision or new goal feels like it could be life-changing. This makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. The strategy that got us here is overestimating how good future rewards will be, obtaining them, and then becoming dissatisfied and looking for more and better.

Playing games so that you don't have to

From this view, I see the difference between wanting money and wanting to be financial free, because I actually think that being financially free will improve my well-being.

It can be worth playing the game to win it, so that you can stop playing it. But often this is a trap, and you can end up playing the game endlessly, like endlessly striving for higher levels of wealth.

So am I working out to look good because I think it will actually improve my well-being, or because I am running away from an insecurity that I'll have to face at some level, regardless of how fit I end up getting? ehhhhhhh.

- [[You can live each moment for itself even in the context of greater progress]]

Because of the animal that we are, we rely highly on progress and overcoming imaginary obstacles for satisfaction and meaning. We strive, suffer, and succeed and this gives our lives meaning.

But at the same time, each moment can truly be enough in and of itself. Think of the monk that spends all day meditating, sitting in the present moment. There is enough here.

But we also want to actualize our potential, and strive for greater human flourishing and achievements, in ourselves and in society.

Holding both of these values, we can live each moment entirely present and for itself, while still choosing a series of actions and habits that leads us towards actualizing our potential and goals.

Yes, if I was a monk then walking in circles could be as meaningful as climbing a mountain, but I am a regular dude, and it tends to be more satisfying for me to climb mountains (The Goldilocks Principle), even with the suffering that comes with it. Further, there is real significance in climbing those mountains when it comes to helping others.

On the path up the mountain each step can be enough, I can be fully with each one nonjudgementally even as I look to the top of the mountain -- to have progress to feel motivated.

**The journey is made up of only single steps, but there does not need to be striving in each moment to reach towards higher goals. We should strive and hope when creating plans, but not when following them through. **