take my own advice first
When I give others advice that I haven't taken myself, I realize I have almost no idea whether it actually works. That seems messed up. Of course, I've heard the advice myself because a smart person in a book or on the internet thought it worked, and I trust them, but Advice is an example of someone figuring something out for themselves, not an example of what you should do. Further, if someone is writing a book or blog post about a piece of advice, then:
- it is disproportionately likely to work for them,
- they are probably in the honey-moon phase of applying that advice to their life
- they are using that advice in its most effective form since they've sufficiently internalized the advice by writing about it. These are probably all not true for me or the person who I'm giving this advice to.
Also, No one wants advice unless they ask for it.
If I give others advice that I have taken myself and applied in the real world and it's' worked, then I can give more nuanced advice, including the fact that it probably won't also work for them.
Further, advice isn't what's actually useful to people or what raises their aspirations. It's role-models that are useful and inspiring.
Why do I do what I do? Why do I try to achieve certain goals, or go down a certain career path?
Did I learn that it would be good to do?
Or did I see one of my role-models being an example of what I want to see in the world?
(Whenever it's the first one, I'm forcing myself down a path I end up not fully endorsing— which is a path I've followed quite often).
Focus my time and energy on what I want to see more of. Your advice won't hit others with any meaningful impact until you're a living example of it.
TLDR:
Why do you do what you do? Why do you try to achieve certain goals? or go down a certain career path?
Did you learn that it would be good to do?
Or did you see one of your role-models being an example of what you want to see in the world?
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